Wednesday, June 9, 2010

FAST coaches answer life's burning questions...

...such as "Does a deer poop in the cemetery?"

The answer, as uncovered by our alert coaches, is a resounding YES.

Although, apparently, the deer do not want this to become public knowledge. Think about it... Have you ever seen a deer poop? I know I haven't. I mean, I've seen deer poop... on the ground. But I've never seen a deer actually pooping. Believe me, I don't feel deprived or anything. I'm just sayin', it's not a commonly-viewed sight.

Well, all that has changed. Coaches Brad and Bekah were jogging back from the cemetery and there before them was the rare spectacle of the pooping deer. At first, Bekah couldn't believe her eyes. Allow me to recreate the scene for you:

"Is that deer pooping?," Bekah inquires, astonished by what she is witnessing. A deer is squatting in the cemetery right in front of her.

Brad squints to get a better look*

"Why yes, Bekah, I believe it is!" Brad's jaw hangs open in amazement. "And look, it's using its tail as a sort of eject switch!"

"Wow, let me get out my cell phone so I can take a picture!" *
click click*

*Deer looks embarrassed*

Now, I wouldn't have known about this whole deer-pooping incident at all had the coaches not excitedly told us all about it in exquisite detail after our cool-down. I think that perhaps Bekah and Brad should submit their story to the Discovery Channel, because I'm sure that deer-pooping is a lot like shark-mating in that no human has ever before witnessed it.


That was truly the highlight of the evening at FAST last night.

Oh, yeah, and we did some running and stuff, too. It was more speedwork in the cemetery. The coaches had us doing short, fast intervals: 800-1000m, with longer recoveries in between. The weather was warm and sticky. Running any distance at a fast pace was tough. The intervals were as follows: 800m, 1000m, 800m, 1000m, 800m (all at 5k pace). And for each of the two 1000's, we were supposed to sprint the last 200m, as if we were giving our finishing kick in a race. Simple enough in theory. Very difficult to execute. I was not able to maintain 5k pace for any of the intervals (assuming my 5k pace is now 8:17, thanks to my recent 5k PR). The best I could manage was 8:36.

Following our intervals, we did four short strides and in each one, Coach Bekah allowed certain people a head start and the goal of everyone else was to try and catch those people. I didn't really manage to catch anyone, which is really no surprise since sprinting is not my thing. But the final stride was definitely the most entertaining one, when Bekah allowed everyone a 3-second head start... except for Coach Brad. Our goal was to keep Brad from passing us. Yeah, I totally failed. Actually, almost all of us failed, save for our two fastest runners who only barely finished ahead of Brad. And so I have come to the conclusion that Brad is not actually human. He will, of course, deny this assessment. Any non-human would.

Peace. Love. Train.

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